today i asked my brother from another mother what the plan was for tonight... his response? "oh wait you still on your not drinking thing?" why yes, yes i am still on my year long not drinking thing, but why does that matter? it's like no drinking = no fun. it's ok, fine, whatever, think what you want, you just lost your free DD.
show of hands, how many people think i can do this and are being supportive? *cricket cricket* since when is giving up drinking a bad thing? i just don't understand why this seems to be the end of fun as we know it around me for everyone, or why everyone is trying so hard to convince me to drink, or placing bets on when i'll give in. i can do this, i believe in me!
i mean, i guess i can see why no one wants to be out with me sober, i tend to t-rex dance in public when i'm not inebriated (probably because i don't have the coordination to do it drunk). and not slurring when i speak? who wants to be around that? i guess i'm less fun when i'm not falling, spraining my ankle or tripping on nothing. and when i get angry for no reason and throw a hissy-fit under the influence, best time ever! and my refusal to give up my car keys because, "i drive more carefully when i'm drunk cuz i'm more concerned about being safe" makes complete and utter sense.
ok, so i'm obviously exaggerating (at least i hope it's obvious) and i'm not ALWAYS the worst drunk on the planet. but if my not drinking guarantees 0% of the bad behavior with 85% of the fun why not take it? so there's only a 15% chance i'll be the most irritating person you've ever been around while intoxicated... isn't 0% better? ok ok, so maybe there's still a 5% chance i'll irritate you sober (and by 5% i mean more like 8%) but isn't it nice to know there's at least a 92% chance i'll be fun and a 99.999999% chance i'll get you home safely and DUI free?
remind me again why most of you are upset that i quit?
quote of the night (after i asked for a 2nd glass of water at dinner tonight): "oh, you were serious about not drinking?"
I believe in you Liz! And I see nothing wrong with funny sober dances. I do them all the time.
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